Monday

Christmas Day and feeling both happy and sad . . .

Christmas is upon us once again and having been blessed with a house full of children I have such wonderful feelings and  memories of the mornings when small kids would come into my room to wake me with their little fingers propping open my eyes. 
 "Mom, Santa was here"  
"Wake up, Santa Clause was here, he even ate his cookies"

 When my children were small for a time we lived in both Jersey and Central Illinois and usually had snow laying on the ground for Christmas and although it was cold and messy out the picture made my Christmas perfect.
I remember dragging myself out of bed before the birds and chickens were making their early morning sounds to the noise of the kids. They were so happy and so awake..  
"Hurry Mom, Santa came last night"
I would stumble down the stairs behind these sweet little kids all dressed in their matching jammies.  Each laughing and squeeling with joy.  There in the room would be the tree, lit and glowing with colorful packages that Santa left sometime during the night. 
I remember trying to bribe the kids saying things like, "We will start opening presents after mom makes her coffee and lights the fireplace"...  there was no way anyone would wait for me to get myself awake and I would resist but they always won. Then the loud, noisy fun began!  "Let me get my camera".. no they just could not wait!
  Yes, all my feeling on this day in the year 2012, are both sad and oh so happy that I was blessed with these beautiful children, who today are at their own homes with their small children doing the exact same thing to them. The sad part is that I miss those kids and the special fun we all had together.  I want those times back, I want those kids small again.  Like my first Christmas as a mom with a three month old baby girl.

 Today how I wish we had the technology back then. To be able to record those cherished moments and be able to save and share them without paying for the good and bad prints.  Remember "film"?  I'll tell you I have boxes of old photos just as you do.  Some blurry and some really good stills.  But what a huge waist of money to bring the film to the store only to pay for 24 when only three came out good enough to save.  
I don't live in the past, no way because I love today but I just miss my little, sweet children and see their happiness on Christmas Day.

Wishing everyone a "Very Merry Christmas"

  



12 comments:

~Lavender Dreamer~ said...

I wishing you much joy! I love thinking back to my childhood and the memories I have. It does make you long for olden times! Merry Christmas!

Victoria said...

---you're not alone! Thanx for sharing. Merry Christmas to you.

Patricia @ 9th and Denver said...

Sandy-
I so totally agree about Christmases Past...it if nice to think back on the days when my grown kids were babies...Yet at the same time, it makes the heart sad. I guess this is the bittersweet of Parenthood. I hope you have a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! As always, I enjoy your comments and sentiments on my blog and have had a wonderful time getting to know you over the years. Pat

Anonymous said...

What a great nostalgic post! I remember those fun days with my boy too. Now I'm looking forward to grandkids some day.

EG CameraGirl said...

I hope you had a lovely Christmas in spite of the fact your kids are no longer small. :))

carol l mckenna said...

Wonderful post for F ~ Christmas and life is a 'mixed bag' and I think many people have similar feelings as you do ~ Wishing you a Happy New Year ^_^

(A Creative Harbor ~ aka ArtmuseDog and Carol ^_^)

SarahBeth said...

Ah yes, the fun and craziness of Christmas morning! That first Christmas as a mom -- that's a sweet picture of your little one. My first has no Santa picture -- my son was just born and a preemie -- his Santa pic was with the Easter Bunny!

debra said...

LOL oh yep I remember film!
And sometimes even having to wait till payday to be able to pay for the pics, good and bad! :

Naperville Now said...

sweet post (and I love the Andy Rooney quote. No chaos quite like Christmas chaos.)

Esther Joy said...

Our Christmas was a bit different this year, so I related with some of the feelings you expressed. I am fortunate to have my children and grandchildren live near, so even though the way we celebrated was different, it was good, and I felt blessed!

VBR said...

Never has the word bittersweet been so understood as when we remember our grown children when they were babies. Happy as we are for the fine young adults they have become, oh, for just one more chance to hold that little baby close one more time.
lovely post.

Jenny said...

Oh Sandy.

I share these bitter-sweet feelings with you.

Every holiday I end up with a case of the blues from missing the years when my kids were small!

I keep wondering in 30 years if I'll look back on these years and miss them as much.

I suspect not.

Nothing is as lovely as things shared with a child!

Thanks for a thoughtful link for the letter F.

Happy New Year to you.

A+